your joking ......i hope ?
Me? Joking?
Hahahahaha, I never joke about stuff like that 😀

Seriously, you should go visit the Duck Down Under for a week. He'd get you up to speed on the technical stuff and you  two could share a glass (or two). Would be good for the soul. At least with some training and a simple laser (laser pointer) dancing a spot around the patio,  you could wake up Sedona from her comfy chair as she thinks "WTF?"

Also, someone really needs to get some eyes on the LBD den of puzzlement. Some here believe it is all an elaborate movie set, kinda like the moon landings. Who knows, maybe you can swap for some of that Festool booty (if there really is any) or get a complementary animal night shirt and become an honorary member of the Duck guild. Pink boots only for the "premium members" I suppose. 🙂