Hello Sir,  This is Bently,
I'm sorry but I'm going to have to pass on this job,
There is no way I can re-assemble this furniture to an acceptable condition.
It would cost more than new if I was to attempt it, and there would be no guarantee or warranty.
Thank You for the opportunity to quote.

      Thank You for being up front.  Could you please quote us prices for New?

Sure,  no problem that would be great,  I'll get back with you in a few days.

Now I will see how deep their pockets are.  Could be a festie in there for me in the end after all, 
probably not,  maybe a Rigid?

Figuring out how to do something you have never done is what makes a good challenge.